We have been struggling to make some decisions for a very long time. We want to make the best decisions for our children and for ourselves. We are a family and love and care for each other. Having a family of 7 is not always easy, but we wouldn't change it. It has especially been something we have been very much aware of lately since we have some one else's child for some time and want to be sure that she has a happy and rewarding experience with us. It is not something we could probably ever do, trusting some one else with our children, so we are honored that the Bahss family has given us this opportunity and we take everything we do very seriously as we LOVE Anna. That being said, there are many changes going on in our home at this time and we feel we should share them with everyone. Many of these decisions have been very hard to make and many tears have been shed and days spent in worry trying to decide what is best for our family. Please remember this has never been taken lightly as we consider all of our decisions important because they affect our kids and family and many others. This is what we feel is best for us at this time. ''
For the past several years we have not felt that we were in agreement with many of the teachings and actions regarding our church. We believe in the core teachings of the gospel and that it is, in its true state, the truth. We don't feel we can be a part of it at this time. There is simply too much happening that we feel is in contradiction to the teachings of the gospel . We have chosen to leave it at this time. We would hope that those of you that know and love us will know that this has been a very hard decision. Please do not ask us to participate in any activities pertaining to church and please do not ask us to do things in regards to callings, etc. Love our visiting teachers, but no longer want them. We haven't had a home teacher for several months so I don't think that will be a problem. We are no longer wearing garments. We respect the temple and it's meaning and don't feel like it would be proper to wear them with the feelings we have at this time. Basically, we are removing ourselves from this church for now. No idea what may happen in the future. Our kids will be allowed to choose if they want to continue attending seminary with no pressure from us and since they have made it clear that they want nothing to do with attending church, this is one less thing. Please understand that this has been a VERY hard decision but we feel the best one at this time.
Dan is actively pursuing employment out of state. There is one job that looks quite promising but we really don't know what will happen so we just wait. We feel that it is best at this time for our kids to not be in what seems to be a toxic situation here and that it is good for them to see that there are good people and good things outside of here. They have felt very shunned as have we for a long time here and feel it may be best for all of us to start fresh somewhere else. We may or may not leave, but this is a possibility at this time. We have to think of ourselves and our well being and the well being of our children.
We are sorry for what we know will come as a shock and make many of you feel bad. Please remember we love all of our friends and family. Just need to take care of ours right now.
~Dan and Christy
7 comments:
What? I'm fired?
Seriously, you have to do what you have to do. *hugs*
Not fired, just now you can come see me as just a friend instead of your churchy duty ;-)
I'm with Donna, your family comes first. I think moving might be really great for you so I am hopeful that Dan can find something he can love to do. And maybe he won't have to work more than one job! You are great people and I am sad that you have felt so pushed out in your neighborhood. (((hugs)))
yiu are always welcome in our home... i know this was/is a hard decision.. having been there myself.. i hope you can find a place with a community that can accept you guys for your hearts and actions... and not their "perceptions"..linda
Thanks everyone
Hi Dan and Christy,
Life is always full of many twists and turns. We can be doing just fine traveling down the road of life and then through no fault of our own need to slam on the breaks or make an unexpected turn. Most often these things happen because someone is not paying attention. People can be so involved in traveling down their own road they forget that we are all travelers down the highway of life together. I have been assigned families to home teach that I haven't had much in common with. As I visted these families they have become good friends. They take us to the airport and we help them in similar ways. What a blessing I would have missed out on if I had not visited these great people. You haven't had home teachers in some time. I know what that is like. We had a home teacher we invited over to share some treats that Betty Ann had prepared. He didn't show up and broke our hearts. We asked the question .. What is wrong with US? Well, there isn't anything wrong with us. There isn't anything wrong with any of God's children. And the home teacher that failed to come to my house, there isn't anything wrong with him either. He just let me down as I am sure I have let some one else down also. I have a neighbor that took many many hours of work to invite to church. She was once active and attended the Temple. It was Christmas and she accepted our invitation to come back. She and her family attended for sometime, and then her feelings were hurt by an unkind word. Was this person wrong in saying what they said, most likely. Is this sister justified in no longer attending church? Not my call. But what I do know is this. Leaving has not brought her happiness. In fact she is bitter towards most of her neighbors. Failing to attend the House of The Lord is takings it's toll. She and her family are the ones suffering. Not those that caused the anguish. She still gives me a smile and kids give me a hug, but an invitation from me alone will never be enough. So Dan and Christy, I hear your story and wish there would be something that could be done to make life the joy it can and should be even with the trials and heartaches. I know that happiness is only found in and through Jesus Christ. I hope you still feel you can find His love in His Holy House. He loves you. He is not a home teacher that has forgotten you or a neighbor that treats you poorly. If moving will help go for it. But all I ask is that you will give The Lord a chance. I know He will come through for you.
My love and blessing goes out to you, Ralph
Just a quick update. Dan did not get the job that looked promising. We are still looking and hopeful for things but nothing is happening right now. Most likely nothing will at least until school is over. We committed to having Anna until June and unless something comes up that we can't look past we will be here fulfilling our commitment.
I have had a major reaction to the cold weather already this year. This is a huge issue for me and I am not looking forward to the winter. With the exception of a short problem at the beginning of our vacation,(It was pretty cold when we first arrived) I felt great with that weather and altitude so I am hoping for a miracle job to come forward for Dan so we can afford to live down there somewhere.
Anyway, we are moving along, just hanging on and hoping for good things.
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